...

it's always the ones who're too nice for their own good that breaks down the first.

why?

why does it have to be this way?

why is this a world where people take advantage of another?

taken for granted... yes... everything is taken for granted.

while i lament of that fact, i realize that, i, too, am a hypocrite by just doing that. i'm no better than the people i've fallen into despair for.

hypocrisy hypocrisy hypocrisy

despite realizing that it rules the minds of many....

nothing is done.

i question. no answers.

my silence. questions come.

my answer. laughed at.

i'm confused.

my fear. that one fear. one which i've assumed to have overcome...

it lingers, it lingers... lying in wait for the chance to seize me as a whole, to push me to it's very edge. even now, it's consuming me.

enough.

i've no need for superficial concern. i'm sick and tired of giving in to the needs of others. i'm sick of this insecurity. i can't help it, i'm scared.

i'm scared yet i dare not speak. i fear being abandoned, despite abandoning so many in the past.

karma. is this my karma? help.

i cannot hold up the act anymore.

breaking. breaking.

i've no right but it's the truth.

falling, falling.

i've become accustomed to falling,

but,

i'm never used to how far i fall.

i expected change, from myself, but it seems that i've expected too much. i am a fool now, for even trying to be optimistic. i am truly a fool.